Thoughts on a Sunday evening in May

Tonight I mourn for you
For my brother, my soul
For laughter left at the front door
For all the hearts I’ve broken
For all the pieces of mine scattered along the way
For all those yesterdays, unremembered or incapable of being forgotten
For all the children I’ll never give birth to and for any that may make into this world, knowing full well they’ll never make it unscathed
For my own childhood, so far removed in the past
For the lovers I’ve left and the ones that will never be
For the tears of tomorrow and all the tears past shed
For my parents loving embrace and the knowledge that someday I will feel their last
For all the sorrow I’ve wept and the world has endured
For moments unappreciated and opportunities ignored
For the smiles I’ve turned away from and joy I’ve let slip through the cracks
For everyone and thing I’ve lost across oceans and seas in my journey
For the heartbeat that beats steadily so close to my own
For its inevitable absence and the hole it will leave in my core
For continuation
For finality
For life
For death
For happiness and pain
For innocent and jaded souls
For all the beauty and ugliness in this world that I will never know or touch
For youth and for age and all the moments in between
But mostly, it all comes back to you
And all the seconds missed in your presence
The little kid giggles, hope and dread
The old age never attained and sage advice I know so well you could give
I mourn for all these things and so much more
But really, I mourn for my life, without you